5.22pm

Surprise, surprise... Zach and I are fighting again and guess who's fault it is... That's right, mine.... I fuck up so god damn much... He deserves so much better, but I don't want to give him up... I love him.. I need him in my life.. He's the only person I've ever found that actually understands me 100%. I know I'm a huge pain in the ass, but for some reason he sticks around.... I don't know if it's love or if we are just scared of being alone... Some days we are amazing and others, like today, I fuck shit up and blame him... I want to apologize right now, but we both need some time to cool off... I just want to curl up in bed and fall asleep, never to awake again... I hate hurting him so much... I don't mean to do it, it just happens... I feel like I can't control myself and I hate it... I need to be wrapped up in his arms... The distance is getting the better of me... I just need to know he's really there... I feel like I've lost my mind. Maybe I have... I need to go talk to him... Tell him I love him... I can't lose him again....