1st April 2014, 12.48pm

Today there is only one thing that I can think about. I keep thinking about how it would feel to have the rope around my neck. To step off the edge of a chair. To have the rope tighten. To not be touching the ground. To not be breathing... To be dead. I want that right now. I want it so bad that I've cancelled all plans for today after school. I honestly can't wait. I've been trying to get people to stop caring and it's worked to some extent. I can't wait to feel free. My mum won't even be home until about 10pm tonight. It's fucking perfect! She'll think I went to bed and in reality, my dead lifeless body will be hanging in the basement.... I can't wait...