I finally got myself into the shower today... First time since everything came crashing down on Friday... It's not like I even wanted to shower... I just knew that I needed it...
I'm also back to day 1 as of last night... I remember crying... I remember grabbing the blade... I don't remember the actual action...
I was supposed to have an interview today for a second job, but I cancelled it... I can hardly handle life right now, how would I handle even more...?
I'm such a fuck up and I hate myself... I fuck up every good thing I ever have...
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