23 July 2014, 7.35am

Last night was really bad... I tried to kill myself.... I tried overdosing, but I ended up puking everything up around 3am....I wish I would just die already....

20th July 2014, 7.56pm

I don't know if I want to recover from this anymore. I just want to hurt ALL the time.... It doesn't matter what sort of day I'm having... I've already relapsed so why stop again? I'm obviously not strong enough to do this....

18 July 2014, 5.48pm

I cut two nights ago. I hate myself for it, but I do feel better because of it. I picked up a pack of cigarettes last night. I had two yesterday. I broke two of my rules about smoking last night. 1) Don't smoke more than one a day and 2) don't smoke in front of kids.

9th July 2014, 10.07am

It has been 5 days since my friend ran away from home. The last time anyone has heard from her was the 6th. From what I understand, she is headed to Anchorage, Alaska.

In other news, I now weigh only 184lbs! I'm also almost 5 months without cutting.

6th July 2014, 11.15pm

I'm sorry I haven't been writing much lately. A lot of things from my past have been coming up and causing incredible amounts of stress in my life. I just don't really know what to do. I don't even think I care whether or not I can stay on this path to recovery. It's so much work faking this damned smile all the time. I hate it. I don't want to pretend anymore. I just want someone to care for even just a minute or two.... It'd be so nice....

26th June 2014, 10.52am

Yesterday marked 4 months of no cutting. It felt pretty good actually. I don't really know what to talk about. David has been trying to talk to me lately. I don't mind I guess since he's been nice. Unfortunately, he wants to meet up with in the next month or two. I really don't want to, but I know I should....

24th June 2014, 7.22am

These past couple of days have been incredibly stressful due to the fact that my ex David has been texting and calling me. Usually it's about wanting to get back together, but sometimes it's just him screaming at me some more about how awful I am... Great, right? Anyways, he's apparently coming up either in July or August. He wants to see me whereas I want nothing to do with him. I don't know what to do at this point. I don't want to get the cops involved, but it's looking like that might be my only choice....